Ship of Fools

Ship of Fools is a usually entertaining website that features 'mystery worshipper' (sic) reviews of congregational gatherings.

I'll use their format from time to time, like here. Only I'll keep the whole thing incognito.

Denomination: Churches of Christ but with a new cooler brand.
Church: suburban of a large city.
Location: high income/well educated area.

Name of Gathering: 10 a.m. "Service"

How full was building: about 20%, not surprising at the first week of the new year.

Were you welcomed personally: yes: a chirpy young girl (5yo?) and her little sister were the welcomers at the entry porch, adults nearby. Inside a couple of friendly nods, a pair of friendly men were chatting at the foyer to the auditorium. We spoke in a quite amicable manner.

Was your pew comfortable: rows of linked individual chairs were very comfortable and attractively in style with the 60s architecture of high steep ceilings and blond brickwork. 

Describe the pre-meeting atmosphere: as above: welcoming conversations, but not many around apart from those mentioned.

What were the exact opening words of the 'service': "Welcome everybody" I hate that glib almost alienating address. There is no 'everybody'. Better to say 'welcome' or 'I'm glad you could join us this morning', or even ' Its  good to see you this morning. Let's start our time together with prayer'.

However as a 'high-church' sort of guy I like a formal opening liturgy...so there! Here's a tip: either go liturgical, or do "homely" with genuine connections made.

What books did the congregation use during the meeting: nil. Everything was on screen, and well managed.

What musical instruments were played: two guitars, one being by the singing conductor. But there was an un-manned electronic drum kit and a vacant grand piano. Looked serious, which I liked. But music didn't dominate, which I also liked.

What I didn't like were the songs. Apart from one re-set old hymn they were of the modified 'Jesus is you boyfriend' variety. People went all 'worshippy' and swayed as they sang. Weird! It was like being in the back ward of a mental hospital.

Did anything distract you?: people swaying in awkward 'worshippyness' as they sang.

Nature of the service/meeting (stiff-upper-lip, happy-clappy, or?): simple 'we are not a mega-church but aren't they great' style. Informal and comfortable, my cynicism aside, although a little awkward and timorous. Tension between 'churchy' and 'community'.

This denomination (they used to call themselves a "movement") has communion at every morning service*.  When I was a kid this was conducted with stiff awkward formality: the liturgy you have when you are not having a liturgy. But, if you want a liturgy, do it properly!

Here, at the door one was offered a sealed cup of a shot of grape juice, presumably, no wine available, and a cracker to nibble on in a holy manner. A 'help yourself' communion.

 As with most post-reformation gatherings this was a pretense of the real meal our Lord called on us to enjoy when we gathered. We ignore that, however as the Catholic/Orthodox 'worship'** idea has gripped us all, it seems, even the Campbellite "movement".

Anyway, at the opportune time we were invited to crack open the sealed cup and consume in a reverent manner. I didn't. No point.

Where there was a point was the 'pastoral moment' or some such name, where we talked to someone nearby. An old member and I chatted light-heartedly and briefly. T'was OK, I guess, but I'm not sure about this game. We do it at my regular gathering as well. She called me 'Peter', which I am not, so I called her Agnes, which as I discovered, she is not.

Exactly how long was the address (sermon): about 25 minutes, but too long for the content. I didn't time it.

Evaluate the speaker (1-10) and explain: 6. She spoke well from a public speaking point of view, was confident, warm and natural. Made good audience connection. A little too folksy for my taste. Some vague point was made, but I was mesmerized by the ubiquitous illustrative "Peanuts" cartoons to follow it..

In a nutshell what was the sermon about: from the continuous use of 'Peanuts" cartoons, I think it was about "Peanuts' cartoons. But no, something to do with Mary's challenges as a new mother.

Which part of the service was like being in heaven: talking to the fellers at the door.

And which part was like being in...er...the other place: I could have skipped the talking down to us worshippyiness.

What happened when you hung around after the service looking lost: not many people came into the coffee lounge (and it could have been a little more lounge like with comfy chairs and sofas). There were some chairs and tables cafe style, which I thought good.

One fellow came to chat with me but he was impatient to get away. My fault, I think***. Shortly then one of the vestibule guys came and spent some pleasant time with me.

How would you describe the after-meeting coffee? They apologized for no barista, but as I loathe coffee-pretension, I liked the simple tea/coffee bags and do it yourselfness. Sort of like the Bertolt Brecht coming out in me. Nice Christmas cake.

How would you feel about making another visit (10=ecstatic, 0=terminal): 5. I creep into this auditorium once every decade or so. Mixed memories for me, some good childhood vibes and less good young adult vibes.

Did the experience make you feel glad to be a Christian: Close, but no cigar.

What one thing will you remember about all this in seven day's time? Peanuts cartoons.

*Christians have 'gatherings'! The only 'services' might be weddings and funerals, perhaps baptisms as special ceremonial gatherings.

**Nor do we 'worship' by gathering or in gatherings. We gather for edification in mutuality, See 1 Corinthians 11-14. The only 'worship' enjoined is as per Romans 12:1-2 and James 1:27. 

***Usually the visitor is asked 'you are a visitor' questions. Next time, I'm going to drive the conversation: "What did you think of that?" (what we just experienced); "What brings you here?" (old night-club routine that never worked with the twittering girls who were alone); "What did you think the best part was?", etc.

Names and roles

We need use only two words for those who take serving responsibility in a congregation, "minister"  (noting that the government 'minister' in UK and Australia, etc. is a minister, or servant, of the Crown.) and "deacon".

But neither as a rank.

Elders is also OK as it has biblical warrant.

So no more youth leaders, Sunday school leaders, Bible study leaders, etc.

Rather, I'd reserve 'minister' for a more general role and deacon for subsidiary ministry work.

So, with the senior minister, who is appointed by the elders to work full-time in equipping the church and developing people's skills, gifts and knowledge, there might be a youth/children's minister, and a minister for discipling (or coordinating minister), who would handle the training/equipping weekends (we call them 'Recharge' at our church) and maybe the Bible study and Christian training/pastoral activities.

All the subsidiary contributors, engaged in direct ministry and perhaps being developed for future ministry roles would be deacons. Youth deacons, Children's deacons or teachers, religious education (in public schools) deacons, or teachers,, etc.

Those serving in non-direct ministry or 'sustaining' roles, e.g. looking after property, catering, congregational enterprises etc. could be termed stewards. A large operation might have a 'senior steward', or 'steward-in-charge' to organize stewards and assistant stewards  for the various sustaining functions.

This gets us right away from a worldly conception of how we structure our congregational life.

The New Pastor (sic)

A recent podcast dealt with a question about "the new pastor"

I have a few thoughts on some topics raised

Altar calls: there are no altars in Christianity. We do not operate temples, nor do we have sacrifices, except Romans 12:1. We have gathering places: hall, shed, auditorium, churchery, eclesiasicum, etc.

For those interested in exploring Christian faith a choice of: discuss with someone (have this organized), a short series of meetings, say 3, or like Alpha course. Greg's approach also has merit, except I'm not aware of Jesus "paying" for our sins. NT words are, in my translation: died for, gave himself, purged, suffered for, put away, bore, propitiation, sacrificed, took away, washed us from, forgives.

Note our gatherings are of Christians and for Christians. The only teaching of the gospel per se would be to train people to tell others.

Sunday School is a must. Needs different branding. One congregation I knew had "team training". It could be called "Focus", for example. Coupled with small groups, this would be the heart of congregational life. The big gathering could be for a meal, song, prayer breakouts and a couple of shorter addresses.

BTW, song is not "worship". Worship terms are never used of Christian gatherings in the NT. Songs are for teaching and praise. The danger with making our gatherings or just songs "worship" implies that we've done our weekly duty and are off the hook for the rest of the week. Again Romans 12:1(-2).

Now, if I was taking up the paid teacher/serving role ("pastor" is a post reformation invention that is alien to the  NT and merely parrots the Roman priesthood, itself combining Jewish and pagan practices) here is my program:

1. A day convocation with church board members, and all who volunteer in teaching, pastoral and other direct ministry roles. We would discuss how we grow each other to Christian maturity; the teaching/training approach; the plan for Sunday Focus groups and how our gatherings are going to follow Paul's program for 'one-anothering' in 1 Cor. 11-14.

2. Do direct coaching/mentoring with 5-8 stewarding volunteers each year: those who conduct ministry functions in youth, small groups and training. Also regular meetings for coaching and support of all in direct ministry, such as small group conveners, youth, elderly and children's work.

3. Draw up a roster to have a meal with every family in the congregation...and small groups of single and solo members.

4. Develop community outreach: that is, going out into the community with gospel, care and support, with related training in faith conversations (Tactics and Street Smarts the texts).

5. Make sure everyone encouraged questions.

Encourage Bible reading.

One of the hired help that serves our church commented to me that the church encourages Bible reading.

I asked how it does this.

He replied: by encouraging it!

I think he meant that he would say to people "best to read your Bible day by day" or some such.

That's not 'encouragement' that's mere urging.

Here's how one encourages Bible-reading: by making it easy, attractive, and purposeful.

The best way that springs to mind is to make the Bible accessible.

Perhaps two or three times a year, a short seminar might be held to introduce people to the Bible.

Let's call it 'Open Bible', or ''Bible made Simple'...name is up to you.

It need only be an hour or so long but it would cover the structure, message and history of the Bible.

To most new readers, the Bible is an intimidatingly large, incomprehensibly complex and diverse collection of books of unknown antiquity and relevance. Typically, none of it makes sense; particularly when they might be advised to start with a gospel. Usually the word 'gospel' would be unexplained and the point of starting in the middle-ish of the volume would not be self-evident.

This sounds crazy from the get-go.

A simple introductory session, appropriately illustrated with diagrams and timelines  would possibly make it far more interesting and make sense of the Bible as an anthology that traced the works of God in history to restore us to fellowship with him, and the creation to its true purpose as the place where God and mankind come together.

So, just three segments:

What the Bible is

How the Bible is

and

Why the Bible is

At the end of the course a little booklet (yes, I still believe in booklets) with a short introduction to each book would be given, with a suggested reading plan that has a low bar: "take it at your own pace".

The plan I aspire to: Each morning a psalm, or part, it it is long, and each day 4 chapters, or only two if they are long. Take your time, digest, re-read if you drifted off, look up words you don't understand.

I aim to read the gospels during Advent, Acts between Christmas and New Year, then the rest of the New Testament by Candlemas (the feast of the presentation of Our Lord). I read in a different translation each year. This has been my practice for the past 7 or 8 years. I love it.

Then I work through the Old Testament in the Tanakh order. I aim for 4 chapters a day, but can't keep to it, so, without worrying about it, I just keep going until all read, then I start again.

I keep a journal divided into the pericopes that some editions indicate with sub-titles. I make any jottings under the sub-title I'm reading. If  I've got no bright ideas, I note down the highlight event(s) of the particular section.

NEXT 

A follow-on session or sessions might deal with apparent contradictions or problems in the Bible. 

Another might deal with Biblical archaeology.

BTW, for the really keen: Until a few years ago the church I am part of had a small group that met to read the New Testament in Greek. None were theologians, but just people who had learnt the language. I was not one of them, as it happens. 

I still wonder what is 'church' for!

This morning at the churchery, the MC, a rather bright and amusing chap related the following:

He had attended with some other fathers, their sons' school camp.

It ran for a few days, and the fathers joined in as cooks and bottle-washers.

One evening, after the business had subsided, and all the gun-dogs had been fed they got to chatting.

It got to unusually grave topics of current cultural significance:

Injustice (of the old type), the erosion of 'truth' as a concept, the horrors of the constant  denigration of males and so on, through the culture-wars and the real wars. 

My pal, the MC saw many openings for the gospel, but, he admired, he didn't take them!

Would you, dear reader, have been able to?

I dropped in to see the MC, saw he was fixing his old Aston Martin..but no, just doing some repairs on his son's Bentley.

We chatted briefly as he kept working on the car. I left.

I think I know the problem.

Nothing in church life equips us for introducing a 'faith-vector' into a serious conversation. We have no words to fill the gap between 'society is in dire straits' and 'Jesus Saves'.

No talk given in our gatherings goes near to cultural criticism that might equip people to maneuver a conversation.

And we always use 'church-speak' in our gatherings. This provides no 'tools' for guiding thinking to faith.

Here's what I might have done.

"Trouble is, in a world conceived of as only material, who gets to say anything is good or bad, or right or wrong?"

"It just boils down to power, and the power sits at the moment with a nihilistic destructive media, feckless politicians whose only interest is votes...and more power, and a mad grab for cultural hegemony on the part of left-over Marxists."

Then, I'd see where we went.

I'd seek to bring in the diminishing ranks of the 'New Atheists'...ranks diminished by conversion to Christian faith  And Dawkins, Murray and other's preference for 'cultural-Christianity' over any other cultural configuration.

But I don't think they teach that in 'evangelism' class. 

What is Sunday for?

A letter I sent to a friend:

I note that the article talks about "Sundays are for worship and preaching".

Here, the author misses the point. Paul tells us that 'worship' is the transformation of our lives. He uses the word, in Romans 12:1-2, from memory, for priestly temple service and the 'sacrifice' is living: us! James also weighs in: 1:27; something the modern church seems to have 'outsourced' to government!.

Nor do we gather for preaching. Preaching in the NT is the proclamation of the gospel to those who have not heard or responded. Perhaps Paul is the model here where he discussed the gospel in terms that made sense to his hearers: the Mars Hill address a case in point.

What we do meet together for, on whichever day, is to build up one another (1 Cor 11-14), to teach one another, where each has a prayer, a hymn, a prophesy  (in the Biblical, not the foretelling sense, maybe), etc. We gather in love for each other to edify one another. The post reformation church has failed consistently with its mere remodeling of Roman priest-craft and transformed the gathering of the saints into a pulpit show.

 

How to talk about death

Last week one of my fellow saints died. He was at a 'good' age, but, of course, death is always...always more than sad (John 11:35).

The parish funeral notice told us that he had 'gone home'.

No.

Language is always a challenge, but I think we must oppose the anonymizing neoplatonistic shorthand of 'going home'.

'presence of our Lord' would be a more direct and focused expression rather than the vague ambiguity of 'going home' which is not congruent with the Biblical data. In fact I think it tends to obscure the teaching of scripture and entertains an almost Gnostic deprecation of the created cosmos.

Thus, my quick stab at a substitute expression:

"We trust that our brother/sister having departed this life is in the presence of our Lord, with whom he/she and all the saints departed will come at his return with renewed bodies to his New Creation."